Choosing a plane seat often involves a bit of strategy. For us frequent travelers, our favorite seats can vary by plane, and it takes some trial-and-error to know which ones are the best.
When traveling with a partner, or with friends, the strategizing can reach a whole other level.
There’s no right or wrong way for multiple people to arrange themselves on a plane when traveling together, but that doesn’t mean that travelers don’t have their strong preferences.
For some, it’s about having their favorite seat on the plane no matter what. For others, it’s more about being together and staying out of other passengers’ way.
There’s no right way to select your seats, but you should be nice to the people traveling around you if you’re not right next to your companion.
Seat preference first
Nadia Henry, who goes by Sparkle professionally, is a travel adviser who doesn’t prioritize sitting next to her husband when they fly together.
“He likes the window, I like the aisle, and we pray that no one sits in the middle of us,” she told me. “Usually when the person in the middle finds out that we’re a couple they ask if we want to switch. Usually the answer is no.”
She said she and her husband try to minimize their conversation and pass things back and forth as little as possible so as not to disturb the person between them when that happens, but she said, they still prefer to keep their favorite seats.
Sparkle acknowledged that she might be an outlier though, and that her clients often prefer adjacent seats.
“Most couples, of course, like to have the window and middle seat or the middle and aisle seat,” she said. “I don’t have as many requests as me and my husband do, with leaving the middle seat available.”
Sticking together
I, personally, don’t know many couples who stay split up on planes. Though some people I know will book a window and aisle seat, they usually opt to move if someone sits between them. To me, this makes sense. I find that sitting next to someone I know gives me a little more leeway to shift around in my seat, because I’m slightly less conscious about crossing the armrest divide.
Other couples I spoke to seem to agree.
“We generally like to be next to each other,” Kate Mikkelson, 45, a data analyst from St. Paul, Minnesota, told me. “With these long flights with planes that have four seats in the center, we tend to go for two of those four, so we only have to bother each other.”
For Mikkelson and her husband, it’s more comfortable to be next to one another.
Brian Murphy, 56, a vice president at a company that manages pharmacy benefits from Montpelier, Vermont, also said that he and his wife prefer to sit near each other on flights.
“We don’t like having some random person in between us,” he said. They’d rather be near each other so they can chat or help each other get things out of the overhead.
“You’re there as a team,” he said.
Last week’s Cruising Altitude: Shoes on, laptop out? Why TSA rules change from airport to airport.
Still, Murphy acknowledged that it doesn’t always make sense to be right next to each other on a long flight.
“I’m 6’4 so I like to have an aisle so I can stretch my legs out,” he said. On long flights, he and his wife often wind up sitting in two aisle seats across from each other.
For Mikkelson, helping each other out goes beyond just lifting things into the overhead bin.
“That’s the other reason I like to sit next to my husband, so I can nudge him if he starts snoring.” she said.
Tips for traveling together
A pair of travelers at Ronald Reagan Washington National Airport. REUTERS/Kevin Lamarque
It comes down to your preference. On a plane, you and your travel companion should sit however makes the most sense to both of you.
But no matter how you choose to arrange yourselves, there are some general tips that will make your journey smoother.
“I do recommend that anyone who wants to make sure that they have the seat assignment that they want, such as a window seat or an aisle seat, that they purchase their seats ahead of times, or they purchase a fare class that includes the seats,” Sparkle said, warning that basic economy tickets or most fare bundles on low-cost airlines don’t include advanced seat assignments, which could leave you separated from your travel group.
Murphy and Mikkelson both said that the key to a good flight when traveling with someone is remembering it’s just a short part of the trip.
Some airlines allow families with younger children to select adjacent seats for free, but a Department of Transportation rule that would make this a requirement that was proposed under the Biden administration has not been finalized by the Trump administration.
“A lot of it is just simply giving each other assistance and space. It’s not a time to start agitating the other person,” Murphy said “It’s a time to be very chill and relaxed with each other.”
Zach Wichter is a travel reporter and writes the Cruising Altitude column for USA TODAY. He is based in New York and you can reach him at zwichter@usatoday.com.
This article originally appeared on USA TODAY: Where to sit when you fly with your partner | Cruising Altitude